<<<<< life in rewind <<<<<<

Ok again - I need a new camera. Still don't know if that would fix what's going on with the operator. They are beautiful in any degree of fuzz though, don't you think?
This was taken at my brother's wedding in April 2009.


Wow! My brother's wedding.



Dress Rehearsal. Gosh - they are perfect!!


Heehee! Valentine's Day!


What a precious pucker face! (Say that 3x)


A new four letter word in our home... HOMEWORK !!
(**&%#^@) Circa December 2008.


Avery and her broken nose all ready for Dance.

She loves to lick the batter off the spoon.

Ahhhh.... Fall! Circa Thanksgiving 2008.

What's a leaf pile without a dog?

Here are some shots that should've been up on my blog long ago. I have no regrets though. by not getting a round TUIT, my procrastination only makes reliving the moment that much sweeter...

Avery's first dance recital. 15 seconds of fame. Or something. :) May 2009

Cupcakes after graduation. I can only hope and pray he chooses the same method of celebration in 12 years...

Jaron's Kindergarten Graduation and the two angels God sent us to get him from point A to B... Those women earned e-v-e-r-y penny. God love 'em. May 2009.

The REAL Dukes of Hazzard

This first picture is blurry for two reasons: 1.) My camera is a bit...err...lacklustre. 2.) This Mustang can really BOOK it! Chris, the dear soul that he is, thought it would be oh so much more fun if he removed the speed governor on the kids' 'stang. I have to literally RUN to keep up with it. Safe, much?

See that giant gap in his mouth? I tell you, the boy is going to have a plank tooth!

The kids have been having so much fun just playing together in the backyard. Somebody pinch me! Last Summer, it was cats and dogs ALL SUMMER LONG. I was a stay-at-home mom then and was able to have plenty of playdates to keep them from bickering with each other. At a moment's notice when the kids would start to get on each other's nerves, I could just invite some friends over and we got a much needed change of pace.

Now I work and they are just the right age to get along famously, so I guess that just goes to show that God knows just what we need, huh? I wouldn't be able to host a playdate now even if I really needed to...

Some things never change. I couldn't get Jaron to wait long enough to snap a shot with his Momma. So this one with Avery is all there is.

dirty laundry and perspective

Last week, Chris's first cousin committed suicide.
Why do people do it? The funeral was filled with despair.
The last funeral Chris and I attended was also a suicide. It was in the same chapel. All he could say was, 'I have sat in here too many times.'

Jaron has been struggling emotionally. As great as his medicine was for the first 2 months he took it, it was equally as awful for the last 3 weeks he took it.
There is nothing quite so painful as watching your little boy crouch in the corner for days on end and cry all afternoon for no reason at all. All he could say is, "I am just so sad."
He also started saying things like, "I wish I'd never been born." and other things that would just break your heart.
He has been a lot of things in his life, but never depressed.
We took him off the medicine and are waiting it out to see what needs to happen next.

Chris's boss found out that he has been trying to get hired on with the fire department and questioned him about it. Apparently, he's getting further along in the process of getting hired because they called his current employer for a reference. Who does that?!?
It appears as if there is a giant target on his back at work now. Who knows how much longer he will be employed there? Through it all, God will take care of us.

I got rear-ended in my great new car. My kids were with me - that had to be the worst part. It doesn't seem like such a big deal in the scope of things, but it still really bummed me out.

So things really are going pretty smoothly despite all the not-as-lustrous things that have happened.
I know that these things just happen. Well, maybe not these things. But things.

Coping with these types of hardships is never easy, but when you can gain some true prespective - you can handle it better.

My perspective came in the form of a 28-year old mother and wife who is terminal with cancer and is hoping for a transplant match so she might be bought another year and a half of life... that year and a half would put her in a position to celebrate her child's 3rd birthday, but not likely the 4th. Many would say from a logical standpoint, "Why waste the organ if it's pretty certain that it'll only last a year and a half?" But she intends to live that last year and a half in such a way that would make it count.
THAT kind of perspective puts all the sour in anybody's life on notice.
It really is all about making it count.

So yeah, it's been tough - but I am getting to be here, you know. That, all by itself, is a gift. I would far rather go through these things with the ones I love most - than to have them have go through it without me.

At the end of my days here on earth, there will have been valleys. I guess it's the way we appreciate the sunshine on the other side of the valley that makes our moments count.

Thank you, Father, for the sunshine. Thank You for leading us through the valleys. Thank You for always being on the other side, regardless of what we learned going through it.

Something about Summertime

...makes me love being in a swimsuit - if only for the most microscopic of moments.

...brings back all the coconut-scented memories of being a teenager hanging out with my friends and drinking lemon berry slushes as we cruised around wishing we had something to do.

...keeps me longing for that all too familiar summer tune. I can chronologically remember summers past with a certain tune playing in the background for each year.

As a mom, I get to watch my kids experience a slip'n'slide, splash in the pool, go to afternoon matinees, beg for popsicles, wear their underwear - and ONLY their underwear - to play in the backyard, sleep until 10, watch tv, build entire Lego sets, do kid things, make giant pillow and blanket tents in the living room, squirm while I slather sunblock all over them, go to grandmommy's house, go to bed late, live with dirty feet and dirty faces...


It's no wonder everybody loves the summer.

kids

i think i have started a thousand posts this way - but i never grow accustomed to watching them grow up. i am always filled with wonderment at the wonder of their lives and how blessed i am to be a mainstay in their audience.

i just snuck into my little boy's room to kiss him goodnight, again.
he wasn't in his bed. instead, there was a giant man with stinky armpits in his bed.
i kissed him anyway.
he grows too fast for his misty-eyed momma...

she is more into pedicures than tea parties now. she says, "thankth for the ped-ee-koorth, momma" because it's always a 'ped-ee-koor' whether it's fingers or toes. but there is a little bit of little left in her. tonight she asked me not to paint her right thumbnail. i asked her, 'why?' she said, 'becauth it'th the thumb i uthe for thucking."

goodness - i hope she never loses her lisp. it has to be the cutest thing ever.

so he's now a first grader, with all the social angst and emotional turmoil that comes with it. he is nervous about going to VBS tomorrow. he's worried that he won't have any friends. i've never had a conversation about that with him before - he's always been excited to tackle a new peer group - literally and figuratively.

she'll be going into pre-k 4 and as long as she thinks her outfit is cute - she's happy. she has been putting waaaay too much tinkerbell eyeshadow on lately and there may be a wee bit too much sass in her walk, but i think i'll let that slide - for now. :)

they are the reason my sun shines.

yes. thank heavens for little boys and little girls.

footache

I have an apparent cyst in my foot that is reminding me of its presence with every. step. I. take.
OUCH!
I talked with my mom about it this morning and she said it's genetic.
My mother, my grandfather, my mom's sister (my aunt), and now I have all had cysts lodged between the bones of their/our left feet in mid to late 20's. All of the others who have suffered from this odd malfunction had to have surgery to correct it.
How weird!
Here's to hoping and praying this pain with every step goes away without surgery!

I write therefore I blog

Aimless ramblings about the happenings of late

I got to spend some much appreciated time with Shannon this past week. She took the week to go visit our Grandmother in the Lubbock area and ended up passing through here before and after her trip. I was actually able to spend some time with her that was less hurried than her last trip. Of course, 'hurried' has taken on a whole new meaning lately... It was good to see her, nonetheless. Jealous?

Jaron graduated from Kindergarten, finished his first ever season of tee ball, and turned 6 years old all in the same week. It was quite a busy week for my little man! He's growing up so quickly these days. We had a small birthday party at the house and he has now become the leading authority on all things Lego's.

Avery is as delightful one moment as she is rotten the next. I think that's precisely the way my little girl should behave - just ask my mother. She is a capable, bossy, opinionated, and squishy sweet princess. I re-decorated her bedroom recently to her taste and not necessarily to my own. She has these ideas that she's already a big girl and that she should get a say in these things, so we went for a more mature look in her bedroom. Aren't these things supposed to happen somewhere between 8-10 years old?? She's 4 and feisty, that one!

Work is seeming less and less like work and more and more like ministry. That, in itself, is refreshing. In my vast experience of a little over two months as a Children's Director, I have learned a lot. I feel I have grown a lot. Most of what I have learned tells me I still have a lot to learn. There's a lot going on this summer between PCE Camp, Summer Camp, VBS, Working 2 other VBS's, Kids' Night Outs 2X a month, working a Chrysalis, and handling all the other day-to-day stuff that comes with the job - I am going to be in real 'teacher' shock by the end of the summer.

But I am grateful. I am grateful that God has surrounded me by such a sea of caring, genuine Christian brothers and sisters. I am beyond grateful for the wise and God-fearing man that is my boss and pastor. He has acted in ways to protect me that I cannot even imagine and I find myself endlessly appreciative.

I am thankful that things appear to be shaping up for us. This is going to be the very first year in our nearly 7 year marriage that 'even on paper' we will make it financially and then some. I am learning about generosity in ways I hadn't thought possible in our limited financial scope prior to now.

My children are witnessing their parents worship - together. So grateful.

No - not everything is going exactly according to plan. We have had some hiccups lately - hiccups that might have been big, life altering events in the past.
But we have peace. God has taken care of us. God will take care of us.

So many things have changed. In some ways, I still struggle with the feeling that my life is deficient in some areas. Just when I feel like I've got one area fine-tuned, I have to turn around and pull weeds in another.
I have not yet mastered the art of balance. Try as I might, my self keeps getting in the way.
Wifely things, motherly things, necessary things, personal things - just seem to choke out any and all need for anything over and above that which MUST be tended to.

However, above it all, I am grateful for the opportunities that God has extended my way. To think that after all the (as a friend put it) left-turns I have taken in life that I would ever be in a position to have a devoted husband, two amazing children, and this awesome mantle of responsibility to introduce and disciple children toward God is utterly mind-boggling!

God continues to surprise and bless in ways my earthly mind cannot imagine.
And I am Grateful.

J. and first grade.

My son, the nutty professor, has been tested and qualifies for the GT program in our district. I have gone to both campuses, the one in our district and the magnet campus for GT kids to see what a day in the life would be like for him. I met the teachers, principals, counselors...

Problems:

• As far as classic 'GT' kids go, I have never met a more qualified all-around candidate than J. Creativity, Impulsivity, Mad Scientist Behavior and brilliance, the whole shootin match... I want him to go where his needs will be best met and where the other kids won't think he's an oddball.
• The magnet school is the campus whose leadership chose to hire a demographic look over qualifications last summer in my personal situation. Staring down personal beef and wanting to meet the needs of your child are a noxious mix.

My assessment of the campuses and their provisions for my son: hands down, no contest, stay in our district.

I went to our local campus and was met with friendly office staff. I saw the classrooms, which were large and well-designed, the teachers were thorough and walked the length of the hallway with their class to ensure that the entire class made it to music... Loved it! saw the kids' work, loved the atmosphere...

The magnet campus for GT students: different story. I met with the office staff- so-so. I met the counselor, terrific lady. I met one of the GT teachers and saw several of my old students in her classroom and was really beginning to think about sending him there. I travelled with the counselor to the other 1st Grade classroom - the kids were peeking out into the hallway asking "Who's in charge of us?" "Where's our teacher?" (6 years old - no teacher anywhere in sight). I stood in the hallway with the counselor and then later the principal and had a very much needed conversation about teacher qualifications and certifications and where they stood on that. For more than 15 minutes, that classroom was unattended. I never saw the teacher come back. The Principal's response to my question was in no way satisfactory. She would indeed rather have a certain look on her campus than ensure that all of her teachers are properly certified to teach in their field. My son will not be going there.

I did not relish this experience. It was in no way a fun day for me as a parent. I really wish I could shove my kids in a cocoon and never think about sending them into the big world - but I can't. I am glad and so thankful that God provided a 'no contest' situation for me to make this decision. There is not one ounce of my being that remains unsure about this decision.

As unwelcome and unpleasant as it was, it is over and my son will be in a good school next year.

300

I just finished wrapping/assembling/tying bows on/attaching cards to 300 Mother's Day gifts for our church.

300 lavender scented gifts.



Lavender schmavender.



Whoever said lavender is 'calming' clearly never scooped 60 pounds of lavender bath salt into 300 organza sachets in one sitting.



I bet the next time I smell lavender I'll skitz out for a minute of two... *twitch, twitch*



Enjoy your lavender bounty ladies!



:)

past and future thoughts

what has happened, what will happen...

• jaron lost one of his big front teeth - finally, that thing was loose since christmas
• chris has jumped through several hoops toward employment
• looking at some neat possibilities/opportunities for him
• we joined a new church
• we've never officially joined a church before
• my brother got married
• how DID that happen? :)
• ceremony was beautiful
• couple was more beautiful
• kids transitioned into a whole new lifestyle, without mommy :(
• my sister became unemployed
• i rescued my son from drowning in a pool, yes really
• he's ok
• we purchased a new vehicle for chris
• i have gained 5 pounds - at least, that's putting it mildly
• j had to get an x-ray to find out if his nose was broken
• i saw the teeth that will be coming out soon in j's xray - they're HUGE
• crazy kid
• nose not broken - huge teeth though
• had a conversation with my daughter that i didn't want to have
• i miss holding her for no reason at all, there's no time for that now
• each time the kids crawl in bed with me, i wonder if it's the last time
• they are getting so big
• have been alone with my husband once in many moons - for grocery shopping
• gave myself a crazy haircut, finally have money to get a haircut just not time
• dropped off the radar entirely
• avery has been getting ready for a dance recital, cute
• avery cries and begs not to have to go to dance every week, not cute
• avery won't be doing dance next year
• she wishes she could lose teeth like her bubba
• he scores big with the tooth fairy
• lots of phone calls, emails, meetings with the new job
• feels official and important
• lots of encouragement too
• i have met some really delightful people
• i feel the absolute closing of a chapter of life and the opening of a new one
• saw some ghosts from my past, still don't enjoy that
• jaron has scored i don't know how many runs in teeball
• got called for a job interview through our local school district, i could soap box on that all day, i, of course, turned them down and i must say the grass really is greener...
• my son is graduating from kindergarten
• he's brilliant
• he is also turning 6
• six...
• chris seems happy
• happier than he's been in a long, long time
• that makes it worth all the sacrifice