Don't ever do it! Don't.

My mom broke down and bought Avery this flip book of 500 or so tattoos.
Yes, my mom. Miss Tattoo, my mother, bought Avery a book filled with them.
Not only did she buy these profane things, but they are actually lifelong tattoos, must have been a typo on the package...
They NEVER GO AWAY.
Once you have a pink glitter flame tattoo wrapped around your daughter's little arm, there is no chisel, no chemical, no amount of scrubbing - nothing will get it off her.

We're talking WEEKS of temporary tattoo.
So right after I finally scraped the last bunch of tattoos off of her, Avery straightway begged my mom to apply yet another one.
Once the tat application had set, Avery came clean to my mom about how much I hate them...

(Disclaimer: I don't hate your tatoo. I don't even hate them in general. But there is something wrong with taking your little girl to church in a prissy little lacy dress with a black and pink flame job hanging just below the dainty sleeve...)

Here's the awful part: We're getting ready for a Halloween Carnival at Jaron's school and that second installment of tattoo is the only thing peeking out of Avery's costume, so I grab the nearest thing - a magic eraser.

Yes, yes I did.
And yes, yes it was a bad idea.

Indian sunburn ring a bell? Magnify that times 100.

Yeah. So just in case you're ever curious to see if a magic eraser might remove a permanent object (i.e. temporary children's tattoo that will not come off) from a child's skin...

Don't ever do it! Don't.

Conversations

My mom asks Avery, "What is your mom going to be for Halloween?"
She thinks a bit and quips, " A cooker, cuz that's real scary."

___________________________________________________

I bring out the medicine and Avery starts sniffling like crazy. Like to the point that I am sure she's having trouble breathing.
I realize she has seen the medicine bottle.
I say, "Avery, stop that or you'll hyperventilate."
She sniffles away.
I say, " You just want me to think you're very sick so I'll give you some of Bubba's medicine."
She just chuckles and grins this impossibly cute grin.
"Aww... Ya caught me...," and away she goes.

__________________________________________________

J: "I'm the smartest one in my class, " he says as we drive away from the school parking lot.
Me: "You are pretty smart, but there's no way to know who the smartest one really is. God gave each of us very different gifts and some days you're the one with the answers and other days, someone else seems to know them all."
J: "Nahhh... I'm the smartest."

Confidence is good. But this? Well, I fear we have created a monster...

Only in horseshoes and hand grenades...

Almost.

Nearly.

The kids have been without insurance since September 27th when Chris made the transition between jobs.
Their new insurance will be effective on November 1.

I have been praying and hand sanitizing like nobody's business, hoping we could make it to November without sickness.

Today we are home. Fever. Headache. Tummy ache. Boogers.
October 27.

We nearly made it.
:(

Pumpkin Tooth

(When I go back to to work, I promise to get the chord that magically makes the pictures from my camera land on this laptop.)

Because you have never seen anything as cute as my Pukpkin-toothed boy.

"It couldn't have happened at a better time of year, " he says as his tongue pushes right past the giga-gaps in his sparsely-toothed grin.
I smile back at him in utter admiration and say, "No baby, your pumpkin smile is just what we need this time of year!"

Just a few squishy 'baby squeezes' left on this kid, but I intend to savor every one!
Thank you God for the blessing of J.
My heart does back-flips for his pumpkin-tooth grin!

Because

Everybody's Crazy 'bout a sharp-dressed man!

Oooooooo girls! If you could see my hottie walking out the door in his uniform each morning...
It'd make you wanna slap yo Mamma!

He's a byoot!

:)

How many times....

... can you title a post "life is good" and truly, truly mean it?

Seven years. I waited and prayed and hoped.

Now...

My husband is home at night. My husband is home at night.
He's here every night.

Life is so good.
God is so good.

Remember to praise your great God who loves you so!

Can it be?

It is sooooo wrong to accuse him of this, so I won't.

But...

If I didn't know better, I would swear to you that my husband has been 'fake' mopping the floor...

I come home to a mop bucket filled with water and a mop in the water - propped in the corner of the dining room.

And the floor?

Not mopped.

Is he trying to score points with a girl who knows what clean is?
Is he shooting for the placebo effect?

What is going on here?

I know, most of you would tell me to be happy that it appears as though he's making an effort.
And I am, When he does make the effort.

But this thing, which I am most certainly not accusing him of, is just sooo very like him.

Do you think it's possible?
Is he really just filling the bucket and setting it out to give off the appearance of helpfulness?

No! It can't be...

:)