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Packrat.

My son knows every item he ever obtained, in what manner he obtained it, and from whom the item was obtained.
He keeps a mental Rolodex of each item. A running inventory. If I remove any item from his bedroom in an attempt to sneakily rid our home of a very broken or problematic toy, it becomes the topic of discussion for days - until he finally realizes that his evil mother has thrown something away that was precious to him. Then we go through the grief process.
It is wonderful. ;}

As I write this at a little after 10:30pm on a Saturday night, he is choking back tears because I told him we were going to have to go through his toys and get rid of all the "trash."
He literally scours the bottoms of our trash cans looking for things to recycle. I know recycling is a good habit and he should be commended for his dedication to the task, but his understanding of recycling and what it truly is are two different things.
He wants to keep the empty milk jug forever because 'there must be some use for it.'
He has no intention of ever parting with any of his coveted trash.
We are beginning to have a bug problem. Ewww.

I am afraid he has inherited a genetic propensity towards being a pack rat - from my husband's side, of course... :0
And I am on the other end of the spectrum. I do not lack sentimental appreciation for truly meaningful things. I still have the shrivelled up umbilical stumps from my kids - I know, that's gross - but I do. I am sentimental enough, just not on the level that my son is.
He makes me crazy because telling him that any part of his lifelong collection is trash and needs to go breaks his heart. He is literally verklemmt at just the mention of getting rid of anything.

So please - savings bonds from now until forevermore.
At this rate, I'll be renting several storage buildings for his things by the ripe old age of 10.

And yes, he's still weeping even now because he knows that tomorrow I will enter his room with a trash bag and it will leave filled up with his 'precious belongings.' Poor baby.

Moronic behavior.

We had a Mother's Day Tea Party at school today and I wanted to look nice. It was also the final program of our school year and the first time many of the adults in connection with our school would hear me sing. I was nervous and felt like a little primping would go a long way for my confidence level.

Wrongo.


I wish I could find my camera and take a picture of the shoes (i.e. torture devices) I wore all day. They might as well have been stilts.

I, the girl with undeniable cankles, have been led to believe that the contour (or lack of contour) of one's legs can be optically altered by wearing very high heels.
I am not sure as to the scientific validity of this theory, but I was desperate to appear sleek and ankly and less stubby and cankly. So I was lured by the bright orange/red Target clearance tag and purchased these stilts er... stilettos.

OUCH!
I will say that the sight of me hobbling around with a guitar and a half-hearted smile trying to conceal excruciating foot pain probably distracted the audience from my cankles.

Mission accomplished.

FYI

An Ivory Comforter, Stay-put Lipstick, and a 3-year old girl do not a happy mother make.

Nerd Alert

I am awake.
I cannot even get to the point that sleeping seems like the thing I should be doing.
I have been successfully pulling off working 10-12 hour days, being a mom, cooking, cleaning, snuggling, bathing, putting to bed, and going back to finish up my work for 2 weeks now.
I have lost 9 pounds doing it - that's the bonus.
Chris has been amazing. He's been doing stuff for me around the house that if I told you how awesome he is - you'd want to gripe at your husband for not being awesome enough - so I'll spare you - but trust me, my husband is way more awesome than yours. :)
I just had to brag on him...

There are two open positions through our district that - based on my paper credentials - I am qualified for. When I think about all the job requirements, I do not feel qualified.
I might apply anyway. Could you better envision me as a nerdy orchestra teacher or a 9th grade choir director??
I wanted elementary.
I'm rambling.
It's almost over - the whole year. I think the years go by more quickly when you're a parent/adult/whatever I am.

I still do not think of myself as an adult most days - isn't that strange?
I am a kid in my own mind. I think I like it best that way. Still no gray hairs. Maybe I still qualify as a kid by some definitions.

What time does the tea party start on Saturday?
Can I pay when I get there?

Clearly somebody needs to sleep...

Did you know?

that a box of Nerds has a blast radius of approximately 3.4 classrooms?
Neither did I... until tonight.
These are the types of facts you become painstakingly familiar with when you are a janitor.
Thanks for listening.

I have turned to the darkside.

I am guessing those of you who go to church with me are noticing my profound and prolonged absence.
I have turned to the darkside.
At least temporarily.
I wasn't going to fess up - I was just gonna slide right on under the radar, but confess I must.
I have been asked to help out at a certain church in town with music while their star soprano is on maternity leave.
I thought twice about it, though.
Then they offered to pay me.
For singing in a choir.
There is apparently a price at which I can be bought - at least temporarily.

(That last line just isn't ruminating well. I'm gonna leave it 'as is' anyway.)

Ice Cream Man.

Why does the mere sound of the ice cream truck turn all children into whiny, fit-throwing brats?
I guess it's so that saying "No" becomes that much easier...

Nightmare.

To anyone who is as excited that it is the month of May as I am, this depiction of my nightmare will make perfect sense. To the others, it may take some explaining...

I had this awful nightmare last night. Truly the absolute worst thing I could have dreamt.
It went like this:
Everything was normal. Normal day. Normal stuff. Normal everything. EXCEPT that it was currently February. That is my nightmare in a nutshell.

Breathtaking.

Did anyone see the sunset last night?
I was fortunate to get home from work just in time to be reminded of His greatness.
I stopped the world from spinning (LOL) for just a few moments to bask in the glory of that sunset. How perfectly peaceful it was.