iMoron.

Would it label me a 'moron' if I told you that I spent almost all evening registering for an itunes account?
idon't ever want to have to go through that again.
ineeded a song for work.
ididn't find that song.
ispent all day trying to find it.
igive up.

If I am ever bombarded by so many i-followed by whatever word they can think of's - I might spontaneously combust.

iGrrrrr!

That is all.

Word Verification.

I must be the worst word verification typist in the world.
All I have to do is COPY WHAT IS THERE.
That's not hard.
But my brain, faithful friend, tries to make sense of the letters that lay (or is it lie? Oooo! I love double-entendres!!) before me.
My mind plays tricks on me.
Before I know it, "spqicnl" turns out looking more like 'special.'

I think I have to type most of those thingies 3 or 4 times.
And THAT'S assuming I don't just give up before my comment is made...


And that, my friends, just became the most pointless post in the history of all blogdom.
Thank you for your time.

Who's fooling who?

Chris bought a scale.
Instantly, I had buyer's remorse.
I step on the scale 19 times a day.
I go to the bathroom and take my shoes off and step on it again, hoping the result will be dramatically different.
This scale measures to the ounce.
I now know precisely how many ounces my bladder will hold...
(I'm sorry, is that too much information?)
You know what I discovered about my sneaky little self'?
When I get on the scale, my natural response is to suck my gut in.
Yeah, I'll bet I'm foolin' that scale.

I've been working a lot in the yard, including lots of weed pulling, poisoning, and the like.
One whole section of our yard has always been FILLED with dandelions. I sprayed weed poison like crazy on that area last week, but I forgot about something VERY IMPORTANT>>>

A few days after I sprayed, the kids and I ended up on the side of our house, which is usually crawling with little yellow flowers and puffy white orbs.
As we turned the corner I saw tons of little drooping stems, which made me feel like quite the victor over the offending weeds.
At almost the exact moment that my pride was swelling in my chest, little A. shrieked and said, "Mommy, oh no! My wishin' flowers are dead. What happened to my wishin' flowers?"
She ran over to a few of them and tried to straighten them up. After she let them go, they slumped right back down.
I felt so bad.

At just about THAT moment, J. chimed in and said, "Oh man, without our wishin' flowers, how are we gonna make wishes?"
Defeated, I replied, "They'll probably grow back, son. Don't worry."
Then he said, "Good. I know what I'm gonna wish for."

This next part is the part that any self-respecting mother would leave out, but you all know I have no shame.
I asked J, "What was your wish gonna be?"
He answered, "I was gonna wish for a bunch of new mommies."

A little hurt, I asked, "Why do you need a new Mommy?"
He replied, "If I had more Mommies, we could already have eaten dinner. We could also go places quicker."

Like I'm the holdup when it's time to leave the house...

I guess it's a good thing I killed all the wishin' flowers. I had no idea what those little turncoats were wishing for...

Politically Incorrect.

My son has been learning about all the planets. He has also been taught that Pluto is now classified as a "Dwarf Planet" (to appease all of us who learned in grade school it was the ninth planet in our solar system.)
We were driving in the van the other day when he asked, "Is Pluto where all the dwarf's have to live?"
____________________________________

As we walked toward our car after leaving the grocery store yesterday, the sun had begun its setting phase and my shadow was stretched out across the parking lot.
A. looked at my extremely long (and wide) shadow and gasped, "Momma, You're the biggest Mommy in the whole world! You're even bigger than that truck!"

If you're bored and have nothing better to do, try this:
1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME (first pet, current car): Lady Windstar
2.YOUR GANGSTA NAME (fave ice cream flavor, favorite type of shoe): Vanilla Bean Barefoot
3. YOUR NATIVE AMERICAN NAME (favorite color, favorite animal): Brown Dog
4. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME (middle name, city where you were born): Nicole Lewisville
5. YOUR STAR WARS NAME (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 of your first name):Ochan
6. SUPERHERO NAME (2nd favorite color, favorite drink): Red Zero
7. NASCAR NAME (the first names of your grandfathers): Bill Dick
8. STRIPPER NAME ( the name of your favorite perfume/cologne/scent,favorite candy): Joop Snickers
9. TV WEATHER ANCHOR NAME (your 5th grade teacher’s last name, a major city that starts with the same letter): Almond Atlanta
10. SPY NAME: (your favorite season/holiday, flower): Autumn Ranunculus
11. CARTOON NAME: (favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing rightnow): Banana Beater
12. HIPPIE NAME: (What you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree): Coffee Oak

"My pleasure"

My parents closed on their new house a week ago today. In one week's time, they have taken the entire interior from circa 1976 to Barney Rubble. They have done almost every kind of demolition you can imagine. Yes, really. Layer upon layer of wallpaper, a 'rude' wall (as my mom said it), carpet, the previous owner's crud (don't get me started), rafters, texture off the ceiling, light fixtures, ancient tile set in concrete, kitchen cabinet/breakfast bar, old appliances...
A total do-over.
I have been spending as much time as I can over there helping out and letting my son, who can think of nothing better than building stuff, help out as well.
On Monday, my parents let him help knock out the offending wall they had planned to remove with a hammer. Boy was he on cloud 9!
I kept saying, "J. if you would rather go play out in the backyard, you can go right on ahead..."
Then he would swing his hammer again and say breathlessly, "No Momma, this is really my pleasure to help you get this wall out."
Ever so often, he would reiterate that this was his "pleasure."
He loves to build so much.
In fact, my parents hired a carpenter to help with a lot of the attic work because my dad is still recovering from a knee replacement. J. looked up at the carpenter and asked awestruck, "Is THIS what you do for a job?" I guess little J. couldn't think of any better job in the world than swingin' a hammer.
He's so into carpentry, in fact, he may be the only 4-year old child I have ever known who can not only identify a Philips head and flat head screwdriver, but also point out that the tool I had in my hand was NOT really an oscillating sander (as I mistakenly called it), but an orbital sander instead.
What a cutie pie tool guy!

Bling.

As far as my daughter is concerned, the bigger the bling - the better.

It is not an unusual occurrence to find her making "jewelry" out of various household items.

When she saw THIS beautiful, shiny toe ring, she giggled and went right to work putting it on...

Coffee.

It occurred to me today that my daughter thinks coffee is something you drink to get rid of a cough.
Aren't kids the cutest?

4 years ago today.

I took my second ever positive pregnancy test.
It was one of the best unplanned things that ever happened to me.
Right alongside her brother's positive pregnancy test, that is.

At this point in my life, I cannot imagine that there was ever a time that a positive result could have ever been anything other than pure bliss - but neither of my 'positive test experiences' were any kind of bliss.

I think I will always regret that.
I wish I could have clicked my heels a little more.
How precious and how very planned by God those little lives were.
At the time, I just couldn't see it.

But now I see it.
And I am so glad for them both.
Thank You Father for knowing exactly what I needed, even when I couldn't begin to understand. I love You.